retrograding...

 It's only been a few weeks since I lasted blogged, but it feels like much longer.

Head Over Heels is officially a year old! Yay! I'll be blogging over there, but this blog will remain my main vehicle for hashing out personal issues. Well, unless I get famous and have to shut it down.
:-) I'm a recovering perfectionist, so the website is always a work in progress. But, I'm sooo much happier with this version. It more accurately reflects my brand and while learning WordPress was a pain in the ass, I do love the ability to have total control of my site. I also have a new found respect for website designers. I'm convinced that the

One of the members of my mastermind group was honest with me and said that I needed better photos. Until then, no one had ever said anything about the pictures. I always suspected that and was the reason why I finally hired a professional to take photos back in the summer. I really like the photographer that I work with now. She's also a small business owner in the Austin area, so it's great to be able to support her. We're meeting this evening so I can drop off the products for the next round of photos, which includes the holiday items. 

I got my notes back from last month's branding session and got excited all over again. I just need to find the time to build another website and start implementing the action steps... in 90 days.

Mercury has been in retrograde since October 2 and will end on October 25 and as far as I'm concerned, Mercury can go fuck itself. This month has been full of problems, miscommunication, etc. Earlier this month, I deposited a refund from my dental insurance company into my checking account. the refund was for a procedure that I had where I paid out of pocket. I'd paid for the procedure with my credit card. So, I planned to use the refund to pay down that card. Sounds great, right? It was... until I paid on the wrong card. By the time I realized the mistake, it was too late. Money already gone. It's been a while since I felt that sick to my stomach. I mean, the plus side is that the balance on the other card is lowered. But, still...

I also had a few unexpected medical expenses. Last month, I had to see my dermatologist to have an abscess on the back of my neck drained. I'd had it done before (due to a chronic skin condition) and knew I'd have to pay out of pocket for it since my deductible wasn't met yet. What I didn't know was that I'd be paying twice as much since it was deemed "complicated." I also didn't know that when the doctor numbed and applied pressure to another spot that was forming, that I would be charged over $100 for that. Ok, so this feels like a first world problem... I mean, I have medical insurance and the money to pay for it. But... I don't think I should have to pay for these things not that much.

When I got home from work yesterday, JE informed me that he'd been let go from his job... effective immediately. A part of me wasn't surprised because his former employer seemed to fire employees for any little thing. It's clear that the organization doesn't place any value on retaining employees.
 He'd been there over 3 years and honestly, I'm shocked he lasted that long. Anyway, he was fired because of a workman's comp claim. Several months ago, JE was injured on the job. A relatively minor injury that required a trip to urgent care and a few follow up visits. He filed a workman's comp claim, but it was denied, due to his (now former) employer falsifying documentation. The case was recently re-opened and there's a strong likelihood that they'll rule in JE's favor. Yesterday, JE's boss told him that they were letting him go due to the workman's comp claim because it had been a big hassle. *blank stare* Sooo... instead of telling the truth, paying the claim, and moving on, you opted to lie and then fire the employee because of the claim, which is a violation of labor law. Smh...

Needless to say, this news was upsetting. I even shed some tears of frustration and I rarely cry about anything. It feels like financial issues have plagued our relationship. I know money is the primary cause for divorce, so that has been holding me back from getting married. I feel like if we can't get it right now, then why even get married?

While JE and I do combine incomes for certain things, I don't rely on his income. So, when making financial decisions, I only take my salary into account. I mean, anything could happen and his income would be gone. So, I live within my means. That being said, it's still a loss of income and unemployment has some devastating effects, particularly on relationships. I'm praying that he finds a new and better job soon. The last full time job that he was offered fell through, so he could really use a win right now.

until next time...